Seth: OK, granted, not in love with me, but at least we're still friends, and things are only moderately weird. I was so scared he was going to avoid me forever.
Our chat last night made me feel a lot more cheerful about the whole thing. Took it out of the realm of despair and back into - ok, maybe this is not such a big deal. If he'd been all serious and OH MY GOSH WHAT DO WE DO NOW about it, I'm not sure how I would have handled it.
I'm kind of scared to actually talk to him in person though. My plan is to avoid face-to-face interaction for as long as possible. I think it's gonna be awkward.
Chris: At long last, you get to hear how the dry spell ended:
After we drove back from Tuacahn I dropped him off (he drove back with me) and walked him up to his porch (he insisted ;>)
I'm so dumb about what to do in those situations. We were standing there and I suddenly got all nervous and wasn’t sure where to look or what to do or how long to stand there or anything, and I was considering running back to the car when he said, “C’mere,” and he gave me a hug, then when I kind of pulled away he just leaned in and kissed me before I could even have a chance to make an idiot of myself. It was kind of awesome. And that’s all I’m gonna say about that because I do have SOME boundaries. Not a lot, but some.
I need to put the brakes on the Chris thing, but it's hard because he's out-of-my-league cute (there is something fundamentally untrustworthy about a guy in his looks range being interested in me, you know?) and he's really fun to flirt with. Plus he laughs at all of my jokes. (That goes a long way.)
When I'm not around him I always intend to slow things down - and then when I'm with him I kind of forget about all of my good intentions and somehow end up promising to go out with him again.
I don't want to use him as a way to get over Seth though. That would officially make me a huge jerk, wouldn't it? I think it would. So no more kissing until I figure it out.
Who am I kidding. I'm not that strong. (I'm kind of turning into a kissing slut I think. I just want more kissing, all the time.) But no way will we be exclusive.
Last night he came over after his class and we were all sitting around talking and he pulled out Lisa's guitar and started playing it and sort of quietly singing along. (Did I mention he has a really awesome voice?)
Come on, like I'm supposed to resist that. I have resolve, but not that much. I mean, singing and playing the guitar all while giving me his best JJ* smile? What's next - he has a chocolate plantation?
We're going out on Friday. Give me strength.
(It's so weird to be going out on actual dates again. Like bizzaro land weird.)
Weight: Drum roll..... Last night I fit into Melissa's size eight jeans (Yes, I know, vanity sizing, whatever, I don't want to hear it. SIZE EIGHT JEANS.) And they weren't even tight. I had to do my happy dance.
By the way, running totally sucks. People keep saying that eventually you start to love it, but don't believe them. It sucks and I hate it. It's really effective though. Somehow I went down a size (more or less) in sixteen days, even though I didn't lose that many actual pounds. I'm not sure what the deal is. I thought a size was ten pounds, but I only lost about seven. Still, whatever, I'll take it.
I was thinking about running a 5K. (Why does everyone who starts running immediately start thinking about races?) I don't know why I want to do it. I'm slow and it doesn't really sound all that fun. It kind of sounds like a lot of work. But it seems like the next thing to do - plus it makes you sound cool "I'm running a 5k next weekend."
Very cool. :)
* Joshua Jackson, duh